Friday 30 January 2009

Calamity Custard... and a giveaway.

Well.. so much for not blogging as often this year...sorry... but the bright lights and lure of the laptop are too great to resist and I am taking this opportunity to join the dance whilst there is a lull in my work..
I was in full production mode yesterday until I ran out of one essential ingredient for my card making... cards!
So today I am flicking a duster (well possibly) and have a hot date with the washing machine whilst I wait for the courier to arrive with my fresh batch of card blanks..
This was yesterday's scene of carnage on the kitchen table...carefully orchestrated chaos!All was going well until I heard the 2 o'clock news announce that John Martyn the legendary musician had died that morning... What a sad and tragic loss to the music industry ..His music defined my youthful years of loves and heartbreaks...I was fortunate to see him play on four occasions from 1979 to 2001 ...and he really was a giant of a man in many respects.. his music will live on in my heart and memories..To console myself I decided to eat something.. isn't that always the way..? Instant medicine came in the form of a cinnamon and raisin bagel.. which first had to be defrosted before I could toast and butter it and introduce it to my cup of afternoon tea.
Put bagel in oven to thaw out and went off to deal with the cat that had also been moved by the tragic news on the radio and had promptly thrown up on the rug in the study! Oh joy..
It was fairly evident that something was quietly smouldering in the kitchen.. and then 'ping' I remembered my long lost bagel and retrieved it in all it's glory from the oven...
Just a little well done.. don't you think!?
I don't know about you but I am a real klutz at times and do the silliest things..
For example..
When we recently had the Siberian snap .. I decided it would be a good idea to wash down our front path as it was pretty grubby and I was getting fed up with the daily tidal wave of leaves and mud that entered the house..
SO.. in my infinite stupidity.. I doused the path with two buckets of hot soapy water to scrub it clean..

Five minutes later on opening the front door to visit the recycling bin.. I am starring in a 'Torville and Dean' production on my very own doorstep ..Yes... pretty obvious really.. Arctic air and water = ice! The entire 12 ft stretch of path is a frozen lake .. in short..lethal..and I can neither leave the house nor can anyone enter ..at the risk of breaking their neck. So.. panic sets in and I start to raid all sources of salt from the larder whilst I fantasise about the number of law suits that are going to be filed against me for breaking various limbs of innocent passers by.. as not only have I frozen our front path but a large tract of pavement where the water drained away...
Tra la la!! Only me .. only me!
Or do you have similar homemade calamities....? I would love to hear them as I suspect that I am not entirely alone with these skills!
Best homemade calamity story will win a small gift...
Don't know what and don't know when.. but I promise it will be posted in time for Valentine's Day...♥
Cards have just arrived.. so it's back to the grindstone..
Have a great weekend one and all..XX

28 comments:

Funkymonkey said...

Hi Michele,

thanks for your tribute to John Martyn.He's been a big part of my musical life since my friend lent me an album way back in 1980 (I think). I heard the news at 2.00pm followed by all the lovely texts people sent in to Simon Mayo. My DH also rang me to tell me the news. I'm glad to know other bloggers know and love him well.

Enjoy your card making, but don't work too hard and enjoy your weekend.

Tracey.

LinenandRoses said...

Don't worry, you are not the only one who has homemade calamities. I think more worst one recently was when I managed to put the hoover through the front door glass! It was one of those days, a Saturday, I'd been rushing around all day and we were going over to Simon's Sisters for dinner. I suddenly decided to have a quick hoover round before we went while he was getting ready. Anyway, to cut a long story short, I was using the nozzle attachment on the Dyson to get to some particularly high up and stubborn cobwebs in the porch. I was pulling too hard and heard a sudden crash behind me. I knew what had happened before i turned round. The main part of the hoover is unsteady when the nozzle is out and it had tipped over, smashing into the lower half of the inner front door which is glass. Needless to say, I needed a glass or two of wine as Simon's Sisters to get over the distress of it. Worst thing is the glass in that door isn't made anymore so we now have plain clear glass in the bottomm section and a frosted one in the top. Looks very silly and is a constant reminder to me not to hoover in a rush when I'm about to go out! Enjoy your card making.

Ragged Roses said...

Mrs C we dance to the same music (see my blog!)! So many of my memories have lost their music... I hope that today that you are now having a serious affair with that card and whipping yourself up to a frenzy. More ice is on the way, best leave the garden path alone dear!
Mx

Flossie and Tom said...

The Story of My Very First Roast Dinner for my husband - 5 courses !!

We had been married for two months and I had so far managed to avoid cooking a "roast". Hubby had obviously been missing them and asked if we might have a roast this Sunday ??

I read cookbook after cookbook - school cookery lessons are ok if you want to eat pizza followed by fruit salad but no one teaches you how to do a roast with gravy.

I shopped and started preparing - I even used the veg trimmings to make my own stock.

I had put so much effort into the reading, shopping and preparation that I hadnt even considered timings -hence our 5 course lunch.

At 2.00pm I served the carrots as they really wouldnt have lasted any longer - followe at 2.15 by the cabbage - 2.30 and the sprouts were ready - 2.45 and it was time for a roast potato and finally at 3.15 - the chicken was cooked !!!

I always tell people that my first married roast dinner was 5 courses and then watch the looks of admiration and astonishment - I then try and change the subject before they say - What did you do?

Sara
XX

Lovin the thought of your Torvill and Dean impression - or was it more Todd Carty ??

Cape Cod Rambling Rose said...

Your bagel looks as if you are preparing to barbeque! =) Thank you for your sweet note on my blog today! I know how you feel about running out of vital ingredients... I've been making lavender sachets recently and realized I am out of... LAVENDER! lol

My calamity? I'm sure there are many, but one springs to mind... I was a teenager of 19 (and still living at home as I just finished my first year of college). I had a late night date with an "older man" of 22. He dropped me off at my home (it was about 12:30AM). He had a two hour drive back to his house, so he asked me if I'd make him a coffee. Mind you, at that time I did no cooking at all... that includes making coffee! lol I pulled down a container of coffee, boiled some water, put the hot water into a mug, added two spoonfuls of coffee, a little milk, and handed the concoction to my boyfriend. One sip, and he spat it all out into the sink. I thought I had made a delectable cup of INSTANT coffee... instead, he drank a mouthful of ground coffee beans! He wasn't too impressed with my kitchen-abilities, but he married me anyway (our 19th anniversary will be in June, and HE makes me coffee every morning... no joke)! =)

April said...

shame about the bagel

I too was a big fan of John Martyn and he will be sadly missed.

April xx

Quail said...

Thanx for leaving a comment on Quail By Mail! You can pick up poppy seeds at healthfood stores like Julian Graves, Holland & Barrett kind of places. Beautiful Bath will have poppy seeds...somewhere!

Simone said...

That table looks like fun laid out with your creative bits and bobs! The only homemade calamity that comes to mind is when I was cutting around the lawn with a strimmer I dislodged a stone that whizzed up in the air and smashed the conservatory glass. I have never used a strimmer since!

A time to dance said...

Hi Michele...I think I was having a similar day up here in yorkshire...hope the weekend will be much nicer and less problematic..love and hugs H

Freckled Hen said...

I really enjoy your blog. Once during high school I "polished" our wooden stairs with Old English. They were lethal which was terrible but truly... why is it so funny to see those you love fall down???

Garden Girl said...

Oh good grief. I can't believe I am sharing this with the world....I had an ornament that belonged to my gran that was incredibly special to me. I managed to knock it off the window sill where it bounced off the radiator. 'Phew' I thought, it didn't break. So I dropped it again, by way of proving my point that U had a 'magical' ornament. And it smashed into a million pieces. I am truly stupid.
Oh dear.
Please still be my friend. Would you like me to send you a bagel? A poppy seed one?
x

The Vintage Rose said...

Ah calamity! those kinds of things usually happen when 'auto-pilot' is on and you're a bit tired or distracted. Strange how they don't come to mind when you want to share them. I do recall however taking two pairs of trousers up for my sweetheart {now husband} and thinking 'every time I iron these it will be a romantic reminder of the first time I did this', however when he put them on they were too short and my Mum had to rescue them with some hemming tape, fortunately I had a decent size hem on them. Needless to say I was glad to get rid of them later as every time I ironed them it reminded me of that mistake. BUT I never made that mistake again.

Tanya said...

Oh you had me really cracking up with this post!
Our dishwasher needs replacing and every time I run a load I have to remember to put in the soap at a certain time in the cycle. Well I get busy with other things and forget to put the soap in, often twice in a row! I probably could have bought a new dishwasher by now with all of the extra hot water I'm paying for!
Just keep having a good sense of humor and it will all work out!

Josie-Mary said...

Thanks for cheering me up!! I'm having a really rubbish week & don't feel like laughing much but when I read your post a smile came across my face!
I can't think of anything silly that I've done ...... I'll think about it today x

jane and the happy crow said...

Hi Michele, I can just imagine you doing a triple axle down the garden path did you have passers by holding up points cards?! The amount of times I have put stuff in the rayburn to warm through and forgotten about them, then wondering what those little black nodules you find days later are! My most, maybe not calamitous, but funny mishap was when we were first married and lived in an upstairs maisonette. Rushing round tidying in my PJ's consisting of a T shirt and a pair of little knickers (I was much thinner then!) I decided to put the rubbish out and yes you can guess it as I turned to come back in the door blew shut. Stunned I stood there mouth open in disbelief, Ian had already gone to work so no-one but the cats to let me back in, what was I to do, our downstairs friends were out so no rescue there. I had to go door to door along the street till I found someone in, a man waiting for a washing machine, that I didnt know and try and explain why I was wandering the street scantilly clad! Luckily he saw the funny side and let me in where I waited for Ian to bike me the door key but I did get funny looks from the blokes delivering the washer! Have a good weekend love Jane xx

LiLi M. said...

This post is so funny. I had to take 24 hours to think about my domestical calamities. Freud would say that I all abandonned them from my mind, as there were so many but I couldn't think of one and one moment I really thought there were little domestical calamities in my life.
Mmm where to start? At one of our birthday parties I discovered that I forgot to pick up the fish the day before, as we are always celebrating on Sunday. Or last week of pregnancy of nr. 2. I'm hoovering and somehow I 'touch' the glass table which falls into 2000 pieces (just after I cleaned it, which was a hell of a job too). Little one of 2 is surprised and wants to seek comfort with me, as does the cat. I'm standing in the middle of the 2000 pieces of glass, holding the hoover in the air, fat belly, yelling that everybody has to keep away. At that moment hubby comes home, two hours earlier than expected. Thank God! Actually a happy ending story.
Or the time that I invited all my uncles and aunts for dinner. Having no car I decided to go shopping and let the supermarket deliver the groceries at home. While I was there I thought I might as well take as much as possible, then I was finished with shopping that week. Went to the cashier with a cart more than full. I paid and then the cashier told me that I couldn't have my groceries delivered on Tuesdays, only on Fridays (my regular shopping day). So there I went like a tramp taking the cart, filled way over the top with plastic bags, home. Of course it rained too. Finally I arrived home. Entering my street my neighbour who could easily be in a LancĂ´me advertisement ALWAYS came out of her door, saw me wet and with that cart! She knew that I always had my groceries delivered at home and said to me: How nice that they gave you the cart too this time. :-)

You are not alone! Have a nice weekend!

Tracy x said...

hey you x
i am way to ashamed of the disasters that seem to follow me around the house to let you in on them!
sometimes i do not even let Stephen know - i am afraid he may leave :)
hope you are having a wonderful weekend with your fab cards.
t x

Anonymous said...

hehe, you have made me laugh with that story!!! very well written, i got the full impact! :) i can't think of any stories to share at the moment, but thanks for sharing that and bringing cheer. i would however like to point out that i'm not laughing at you but with you ;-)

hope your okay,
Lucy xx

jane and the happy crow said...

Hi Michele I have given you an award and tagged you if you would like to pop over and pick them up. Just copy and paste the award to your blog, Love Jane xxx

Margie’s daughter Leiny said...

Hi Michele, John Martyn was a part of my growing up, sad news indeed. I am sure that everyone does silly things often, I am known for it and I find the best medicine is to laugh. So here is one which I am often teased about. We were invited to the Belgian Embassy in Dublin to meet with the King and Queen of Belgium, we were so excited, even though I had left my clothes ready the night before, I had second thoughts about my boots, worried they were too high to stand for a long time in and tried on a completely different one, which was two inches shorter. Imagine my surprise when driving there half an hour later I looked down to see I was still wearing one of each of the boots and the thing that gets me is that I never noticed or felt the height difference. hugs Margie.

silverpebble said...

That gave me a good old laugh on a perishing Sunday morning. Thanks Mrs Custard. Calamities? Many and varied. When I was in (very slow) labour with Miss P1 we went into hospital to have me checked over and were sent away again as not much was happening. We went to the supermarket to pick up snacks for the hours/days ahead. Mr P left me in the car (my tummy was rather cumbersome) but he absent-mindedly locked me in. I moved (as one does) and the alarm went off. It was a newish car and I didn't know how to turn it off. At one point a small crowd gathered to laugh at the silly woman stuck inside the car with the alarm going off. This went on for10 minutes. Special. I was rather narky with Mr P when he returned with the muesli bars. Emma x

Niki Fretwell said...

Hi Michele,
I thought of you this morning when I saw the snow falling...knowing how much you love the white stuff! And then I read about you creating a toboggan run down your front pathway? Not a good idea! Although I shouldn't laugh...
My worst calamity was when a large parcel arrived for me one day. It was packed solid with screwed-up newspapers as a packing material. Now normally I would smooth them all out and add them to the recycling bin, but this time, as it was chilly, I thought I would use it to light the fire...well, lets just say that it started the fire a little too well...a couple of the sheets literally got drawn up the chimney, whilst on fire. Molten soot then started to drip down from inside the chimney – pretty scary! I nipped outside and realised that the chimney was on fire! I quickly had to own up to hubby and he ran and fetched our chimney sweep brush. He threaded the brush up the flu as fast as he could, hoping that it would dislodge the red hot soot! Thankfully it did the trick, but as he pulled the long pole of the brush down again, all that was on the end was a melted black blob of goo! No bristles left at all! We couldn’t help but laugh at the sorry state it was in! (We’ve since bought a new brush head, in case I should do it again…but I don’t think I shall be tempted….;-))
Have a great week – enjoy the snow,
Niki

noodle and lou said...

ooooh ***giggle*** Michele! Yes...my whole life is a calamity of sorts:):) Thankfully, I am able to laugh at myself...alot;) You are not alone my friend! Wishing you a wonderful week!!! xox...jenn

Teena Vallerine said...

I could not possibly enter your giveaway on the grounds that I might incriminate myself - does accidentally demolishing your house count? Nope. I'm not going there! The mortgage company might be reading! t.x

Anonymous said...

I found a wonderful old red and white striped towel at a jumble sale some years ago and as it was a bit grubby decided to give it a boil wash. The only saucepan big enough was a huge, and very expensive, Le Creuset one which was my brother-in-law's pride and joy (he and my sister were staying with me for a few months whilst their house was being renovated.) I filled the Le Crueset with hot soapy water, popped in the towel, and settled down to in another room to read.

Some considerable time later the smoke alarm went off - yes, the darn towel had not only burnt dry, but was now on fire and had badly singed the inside of le very expensive Le Creuset pan. Huge panic set in as I tried to put out the flames without setting the house on fire, and tried to remove all offending marks from the pan. Somehow I must have done a good job as my brother-in-law never noticed. The towel, of course, was totally ruined.

Then there is the story of the exploding hard-boiled egg which went off with the force of a bomb and plastered the kitchen in bits of egg - but I'll save that for another day!!

Michael House said...

I never liked John Martyn until recently, and had only really decided I actually did enjoy his work shortly before I heard he had died.

I am always doing stupid things, so you are not alone at all! Most seem to involve falling over. We recently had a leak in a pipe coming out of our little cottage behind the house. There did not appear to be a stop cock for that water and it flowed out, into the frozen flower beds and down the slope into the road. Fortunately none was indoors. I came out of the main back door, cat under one arm to take him to the warmth of the cottage and hammer in the other to bash down a stair under which might have been lurking a stop cock (it was not, there isn't one, there soon will be). I fell flat on my face in a stream of freezing water, as the step had frozen up. Cat went one way, hammer the other! I felt very useless. Simon eventually turned off the water down by the road, but not before enough had got to the road to make that into an ice rink as well. We have not heard from anyone's solicitor as yet! Ted has forgiven me for hurling im through the air! My knees are begging me to stop tumbling over!

iappearjiggy said...

I am laughing out loud about the frozen lake! Years ago I owned a 1973 giant chevrolet station wagon and alas, it had no garage for a home. One very cold winter morning as I rushed to transport children to school, I hadn't time to scrape frozen snowy windshield so a lightbulb moment prompts me to throw a giant kettle full of hot water over it! Snap, crackle, pop! And I am not talking rice crispies either. You are not the only one!

Tracy Nuskey Dodson said...

Ooooh, do I have a good one. My husband left in the morning for his first day at a new job and I went outside to check on the sprinkler. After about 10 minutes I went to go back inside only to realize that I had locked myself out...with my 2 year old son still in his crib! I ran to all of my neighbors homes to ask for help and finally found someone who let me use their phone. Of course I didn't know my husband's number yet so I had to spend the next 15 minutes talking with a million people to try and find my husband. All the while I could hear my son calling me from his closed window.
So on my husband's very first day at work, he had to rush home to let his idiot wife back in the house.
Feel better?
Tracy